The Critical 'I'

Read. React. Repeat.

Saturday, March 20, 2004

PARIS IN TAMPA
partying in ybor
It's true: Paris Hilton busted her ass falling off a horse in the rural regions north of Tampa, and was tracked down at a Tampa hospital hours later.

As long as she's in town, she might as well take a well-deserved break from filming the second season of "The Simple Life" and spend tonight partying in Ybor City, where I'll be (changed my mind, I'm heading out to Hyde Park instead). I typically avoid blondes, but given her other a$$et$, I'll make an exception.

As the news crews packed up and rushed from the scene to prepare for broadcast, a man and woman walking out of the hospital looked at the scene, perplexed. What is going on, the man asked, what is all the commotion?

"It's Paris Hilton," shouted a cameraman.

"Who is that?" the man asked.

The cameraman shook his head.

"Who is that?" the cameraman said. "He needs to watch more TV."

No he doesn't, cameradude. He needs to hit the Internet, where Paris' best work can be found.