The Critical 'I'

Read. React. Repeat.

Monday, December 08, 2003

PAYPAL FOR MUSIC SALES
Just when it looks like the micropayment model for Web commerce is making a (thankful) comeback, Paypal takes the initiative to lower its rates for online music stores in order to corner that market.

It's a shrewd move by PayPal, especially if it can deliver and sign up Apple's iTunes Music Store, primarily (the other ala carte music stores would be nice too, but as iTunes is the most prominent, it's the one that matters most). I'm expecting an announcement that Apple and PayPal have struck a deal as soon as this week.
WHY OPRAH WON'T DO DAVE
thou hast foresaken me, oprah
I think most people got a big kick out of Dave Letterman's obsession with being accepted by Oprah; I know I did. Now, O tells her side of the story:

"Both times I was sort of like the butt of his jokes, " Winfrey tells Time magazine for its Dec. 15 issue. "I felt completely uncomfortable sitting in that chair, and I vowed I would not ever put myself in that position again."

I'm thinking Dave's gonna have to play kiss-kiss and make a deal to get her on the show, and he on hers. Hey, he managed to get Dr. Phil to appear on his show. Let's make it happen!

Sunday, December 07, 2003

R.I.P. JENNICAM
It's a sad day for online voyeurs everywhere as JenniCam, one of the pioneers of the modern-day Web, will be shutting down by the end of 2003 after over seven years.

In fact, my attempts at accessing the site as of this writing are unsuccessful. Could it be that she's decided to shutter up a few weeks early? More likely, the site's experiencing a huge spike in visitors as the news spreads.

This feature article by CNN from 1999 on Jennifer Kaye Ringley (the Jenni in JenniCam) is an interesting time capsule on how the early development of the Web was being perceived and predicted. I'd have to say that, in a real way, JenniCam was a failure, in that it didn't make her famous except as an oddity. The novelty of seeing someone on camera 24/7 obviously predated/inspired most strains of reality TV, but it hasn't resulted in a bunch of mainstream celebrities. In a lot of ways, the tone of that article from nearly five years ago reminds me of the current blogging proselytizing. It appears that a cycle has begun, with the Next Big Thing in "grassroots" media (the quotes are intentional, and skeptical) will keep appearing and reappearing for the next several years.

Actually, I can sympathize with JenniCam fans. I was wistful when I discovered the demise of Interactive Ralph Wiggum, one of the first-ever Web phenomena I had the pleasure to experience. It's hard to see an old corner of the Web go away. Just think, one day, as established a URL as Yahoo! may go blank; then we'll all really feel old.
PLEASE, HEBREW, DON'T HURT 'EM
i'm gonna git you, sheygets
The Hebrew Hammer looks like what would have happened had Mel Brooks made a blaxploitation flick.

Yes, of course I'll be watching it when Comedy Central airs it tomorrow night. Hava nagila, baby.

Given that it's going to be on TV, I'm wondering if all the notices on the official site about a December 19th (that's Hannukah, by the way) theatrical release aren't way out of date. It'd be highly unusual for a movie to be shown on television first, and then get a release.

Update: Jewschool is all gliklekh from all the Hammer media hype. Shabot shalom, muthafucka!

It turns out that the film will indeed get a limited theatrical release after being shown on the tube. I guess the moviemakers are counting on the television exposure to drive ticket sales, with the hip factor and Hannukah combining for success.

Unfortunately, there's not currently a theater showing in the Tampa Bay area. However, it just so happens that I'm going on a weekend trip to Fort Lauderdale on the 19th, the same day Hammer will open. Maybe, just maybe, I can make time to catch it while I'm down there!
INTIFADA ON THE GRIDIRON
What's in a name? Touchy stuff when it comes to an athletic tournament in Southern California. Muslim youth around Los Angeles chose names like "Intifada", "Soldiers of Allah", and "Mujahideen" for their football teams, drawing the ire of area Jewish leaders.

As always, one side's terrorist is another side's freedom fighter. As charged as the situation is between Palestinians and Israelis (or even more generally, Jews), it takes only something as relatively minor as this to get people's temperatures up.
BROADBAND: PUSHING PRICE OVER SPEED
We've seen before how cable broadband is twice as popular as DSL for American households, and how the consumer perception that the Web is primarily an entertainment medium encourages the adoption of Internet service from the same company that pipes in televised entertainment.

The telephone companies don't have to take this lying down, of course. Realizing there's no better way to change perception than to make it financially worthwhile, telcos are aggressively lowering prices on tier-based DSL broadband services, spurring some increased adoption and bringing the prospect of large segments of the population with distinctly different flavors of high-speed access.

It's a strategy that may not withstand the forward march of Internet technology. Going half-speed on broadband may be fine for now, especially for light users. But if those forever-anticipated killer apps that are supposed to fully exploit broadband capacity (like broadband television and other video content) ever actually come into being, cut-rate broadband will suddenly be painfully slow. After all, 56K at one time seemed exotically fast, especially considering the low bandwith of the Internet in general during the late '90s. Now, of course, fuggedaboutit.

I know the price difference was a major factor in my choosing between DSL and cable. Even after the reduced monthly rate went back to the regular monthly fee, it's still ten bucks less than cable. That's a big enough difference, especially considering the speed is comparable enough that you never notice. The only other factor that equalled in importance for me was reliability, and I had heard enough bad news about the cable broadband outages around here to steer me away.

Saturday, December 06, 2003

STEAK-WINE MARINADE
A note for the future: Don't use a red burgundy wine for marinating steak. At least, not the standard table wine I enjoy. I prepared my dinner tonight doing this, and the results were pretty poor. Maybe a merlot is better for marinating? Better yet, just go to a steakhouse...
SAINTS AND SINNERS: NEVER AGAIN
ain'ts, innsers
Well, I made it downtown for the Saints and Sinners IV filmfest. I left after about two and a half hours, after taking in the opening feature film and three or four of the short films that followed.

It was not exactly Cannes.

I said it would be a schlockfest; I don't think that covers it. We're talking total, complete amateur hour here. The feature was unintentionally funny, with the director and cinematographer (probably the same guy) apparently never hearing of closeups, scene cuts, lighting, segues or any of the other things you take for granted in a movie. The acting wasn't there, which was about right since I doubt there was much of a script there either. The director tried to get around all this by making the story a cross between The Blair Witch Project and Cops, with requisite amateur videocam look; didn't work. The shorts were just plain goofy. The last one's gimmick was that it was made as part of a competition to make a short film, from start to finish, in seven days or less; the filmmakers seemed to take pride in having made their in only two days. My only reaction to that is, speed is not a selling point when it comes to filmmaking, and doesn't necessarily portend a successful film career.

I'm not going to bother to name names; the link to the festival website will tell you what films were shown when. Rest assured you're not going to be seeing these things in a theater near you soon, nor even on the Internet Movie Database.

I said it wasn't Cannes. I wasn't expecting that, or anything near it. In a sense, I feel a little guilty criticizing what are obviously unpolished labors of love and, hopefully, stepping stones toward better work. On the other hand, they can't present their work to audiences and not expect critiques; that's really the purpose of a show like this, or should be. But obviously, it's not for me. There are bad movies, and then there are no-money, no-talent, no-skill presentations like these. I consider them the same way I do minor-league and (even more apropos) high-school athletics: They're painful baby steps that may be necessary links in the game, but that doesn't mean I have to watch them.

The crowd was pretty pathetic. This may have been because it was early, and the bigger audiences would be coming at night. But I'm not so sure... It looked to me that most of the audience consisted of the filmmakers and their entourages, such as they were. Really not much mingling either, which was another reason for my going. It might be just as well, as I'm not sure I would have had much fun dissing somebody over his movie right to his face.

It's safe to say I won't be attending another one of these, barring a radical revamp (the venue and operations were firmly amateur as well). I'll stick to the polished products--at least, more polished.
SPACE INVADERS: BACK TO THE ARCADES
comin' to getcha
As they say, the classics never die, mon. At least not for long. Taito is relaunching Space Invaders as an arcade cabinet coin-op machine to coincide with the game's 25th anniversary. Nostalgia forever!

On the surface, it seems like a questionable move. Space Invaders is exemplary of oldschool videogames, with perhaps only Pong being a better example. If this recent field testing of today's youth is an accurate representation, and I think it is, I don't see this catching on with the typical arcade dweller.

Then again, it's not like this relaunch is aimed at the kids: It's targeting the now grown-up kids who used to spend countless hours and quarters frying their brains on this game back in the 70s and 80s. Most sizable arcades have a section of classic game machines off in a corner somewhere, so there's certainly a market. So what if you can play this game on a cellphone--being able to stand in front of an oversized coin-op machine and get the old-time arcade experience goes a long way toward making this a success. And who knows, maybe the kids will catch on too.

Friday, December 05, 2003

PSX STRIPPED-DOWN
less than it can be
Sony's PSX hybrid console is just about ready to hit the stores, but it's not going to have all the features and capabilities that were originally planned. The main changes are going to be limitations, like the inability to play all media formats (disc and digital files) and lack of broadband connectivity.

The reasons given by Sony are that the subtractions are being made in order to get the product onto store shelves quicker. It appears to me, though, that the changes were made to make it harder to use the PSX to copy and distribute digital media. What other reason could there be for slowing down the disc drive's spin speed? Why else would you restrict the playback of rewritable discs? Why else would MP3s be incompatible media? I say the changes were made to undercut potential piracy.

In any case, I'll stick to my original prediction that the PSX is intentionallly being set up for failure as a loss-leader and market-prepping device.
ONCE AGAIN, SAINTS AND SINNERS
sinnin', saintin'
This one would have slipped by my radar if a friend hadn't clued me in just now: The Fourth Saints and Sinners Film Festival is happening tomorrow afternoon/night at St. Pete's State Theatre.

I had intentions of attending the last Saints and Sinners fest back in May, but passed on it due to lack of motivation. Part of the reason I opted out back then was because I had just taken in the Cinema of Agitation at the Salvador Dali Museum, and wasn't sure I was up for another marathon of film. The other disincentive was that Saints and Sinners looks like a schlockfest. Not that schlocky indy films don't have a charm all their own, but I'm not sure I can sit through hours of them (unless they're in Mystery Science Theater 3000 form, of course).

The program for this edition of the festival appears to have even less emphasis on horror/slasher flicks. That's a plus for me, actually. Still, I dunno. It'll have to be a game-time decision for me. Probably the biggest appeal would be just to see what the atmosphere is like; aside from the film geeks, there'll have to be plenty of aspiring actors and filmmakers around, and they'll be fun to interact with.

Thursday, December 04, 2003

SIX DEGREES OF SEPARATION: TRADING SPACES
Yo yo, "Trading Spaces" is in da house. Not my house, but they're in the general area, doing their thing over in north Tampa.

I've never watched the show. I don't own a home, don't anticipate doing so for a while, and am not even very interested in interior (or exterior) decorating; so there's not a lot there for me to glom onto. But, I did discover a reason to take interest in it earlier today.

Note the linked article features a big ol' picture of Spaces crew member Ty Pennington doing his whacky schtick on a Tampa street. Despite never having watched the show, even I've heard of Ty; I guess he's gaining celebrity from the show.

The Art Director, Gary, at the magazine I work for also has never watched the show, but he did read the article. Lo and behold, it turns out Gary used to work with Ty Pennington! Not in home decoration, but in the magazine production biz. Turns out Ty was once a struggling young man in Georgia, and my colleague would regularly hire Ty to do some paste-up/design work on a magazine they produced up there about 10 years ago. He even recalls when Ty left for greener pastures: Gary gave Ty a call one day to come in for some work, and was told that he couldn't as he was on his way to New York to do some modelling. Gary's pretty surprised that Ty has hit the bigtime like this; according to him, Ty's got a touch of Attention-Deficit Disorder (so the stuff on camera is not an act).

So, there's the slight claim to fame I've got: I know someone who used to know Ty Pennington. Weird, wild stuff.
BROUGHT TO YOU BY...
team effort
If you think there's too much commercialization in sports, then you'll cringe--with delight--at this sponsorship-driven tour through the St. Pete Times Forum, home of your Tampa Bay Lightning.

Actually, in light of this, they're not so much your Tampa Bay Lightning as much as they are the sponsors'.

Here's a breakdown of all the sponsors and their placement, and Chrysler-Jeep's success story as a primary sponsor at the Forum. Also take note that the newspaper that's bringing you this news, the St. Petersburg Times, is of course the arena's naming-rights holder.

I'm really surprised they didn't mention the seemingly endless credit-card signup tables that are lined up on the concourses between concession stands. They're always offering t-shirt, totebag and othe trinket giveaways in exchange for signing people up for a card. They're always out in force, and there are always people signing up, so I imagine it's super lucrative for the credit card companies.

The other point missed here is the marketing residuals that come after this captive audience leaves. The credit card tables get plenty of direct personal information from the schlubs they sign up, so they can then start sending them junk mail and spam and target their neighborhoods with more marketing. Same deal for all the other raffles and other giveaways. No doubt, a sporting arena is a goldmine.

A couple of interesting tidbits from the main article:

[Lightning and Forum president Ron] Campbell said ownership hopes to sell $21-million in Lightning tickets this year and make $17-million on sponsorships, counting hockey and all other arena events.

It's surprising to hear any sports team exec give out specific numbers like that, considering how they're alway bleating about going broke. Of course, this is far from their only revenue streams: Concessions, extended marketing, parking and at least a dozen other opportunities keep the dough rolling in.

Last year, a fan wrote [minor league sports maestro Mike] Veeck a polite but scathing letter accusing him and his ilk of ruining the game. Naturally, Veeck made a promotion of it - Complaint Night - and invited the fan to throw the ceremonial first pitch.

The fan is 53-year-old Michael Grubb, the chief administrator of a medical group in Charleston.... Grubb detests that the "garbage" of sponsorships and silly promos drowns out the heavenly sounds of the game (infield chatter, ball meets bat).

"Everything is commercialized to the hilt because it's such a moneymaking endeavor, driven by the outlandish salaries the players have to have," he said. "I just don't follow professional sports anymore. There's just no point to it."

And yet:
Grubb said he was "devastated" when Veeck informed him that attendance for Complaint Night (a.k.a. Purist Night) came nowhere near attendance for Tonya Harding Mini-Bat Night. There you go.

Curious; why would he be "devastated" that one of the promotions he claims to hate so much didn't do so well? He should have been elated. Without consciously realizing it, he's just as sucked into the commercialism in sports that supposedly turns him off. And he's living in a fantasyland if he thinks amateur (i.e. college, high school and little-league) sports are any less commercialized.

Actually, he's living in a fantasyland altogether, because there never was a time when commercial endeavour wasn't part of sports. It's just more obvious now.

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

ELVIS THE MUSICAL
It's Jailhouse Rock meets Guys and Dolls... or something like that... as "All Shook Up", a musical revue of Elvis Presley's greatest hits, makes its Broadway debut in 2005.

It'd be nice if they'd include Mojo Nixon's "Elvis is Everywhere" in the show.

Whatever, I'm sure this Elvis-thon won't be able to hold a candle to the swingin' sensation of Dr. Zaius, Live in Concert (adjust your volume accordingly before clicking).
FREELANCE WIRING IN SHANGHAI
Here's a great portrait of Shanghai, a city on such a breakneck pace of modernization that electrical/telecom wiring is draping the skyline.

It sounds like a vibrant, almost Wild West kind of environment. Must be fascinating to witness.
"NANO": THE NEW DOT-COM
Not so many years ago, the presence of a ".com" at the end of your publicly-traded company's name practically ensured a parade of suckers to toss money your way and jack up your stock price. You'd think investors would have smartened up at least a little in the wake of the dot-com bust; it turns out they've just been waiting for the next gee-whiz opportunity.

What is the sector du jour? Nanotechnology. In a natural progression frombroadly misusing the term, ignoramuses with more money than sense are buying up shares of Nanometrics, a company that sounds like it's involved in nanotech but isn't.

So that's your new get-rich-quick scheme: Start up a dummy company, make sure it's got "nano" as part of the name, get it listed on an exchange, and wait for the stock price to shoot up. I think I'll start a company named "Nano-Nanu Inc."; it'll specialize in selling DVDs and videotapes of old "Mork & Mindy" episodes. A sure-fire goldmine!
RAY LIOTTA IS THE BEST HUMAN
Ray Liotta is certainly an acclaimed actor, but I'm sure his award for "Best Performance By A Human" at the Spike TV Video Game Awards is the crowning achievement in his career.

This news instantly reminded me of the late, great Troy McClure's reaction to his landing the part of The Human in the lavish musical production of "Stop The Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!":

"It's the part I was born to play, baby!"

I hope Liotta made sure to include that tidbit in his acceptance speech.
IT'S LO-OG, IT'S LO-OG
from blammo!
Following on the sentiment established yesterday with Triumph, today I present "The Log Song", from the dearly-departed "Ren & Stimpy Show":

What rolls down the stairs
Alone or in pairs
Rolls over your neighbor's dog?
What's great for a snack
And fits on your back?
It's Log, Log, Log!

It's Log, Log
It's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
It's Log, Log
It's better than bad, it's good!
Everyone wants a Log!
You're gonna love it, Log!
Come on and get your Log!
Everyone needs a Log!

Hmmm... I wonder if one could add a "b" to the start of it and redub it "The Blog Song"? I guess the "rolls down stairs" and "rolls over your neighbor's dog" parts don't jibe well with weblogs. Still, it's got to be better than this attempt.

Tuesday, December 02, 2003

FOR HIM TO POOP ON
poetry
Do you enjoy Triumph the Insult Comic Dog as much as I do? Of course you do. So I'm sure you too will enjoy suggesting websites for him to poop on. Let me start you off; you're welcome.

ADDENDUM: The Triumph hits just keep on coming, with National Public Radio lending legitimacy to the little dog puppet. NPR interviews Triumph, and Triumph creator Robert Smigel too.
THE FUTURE OF FUTURISM
Does anyone else see the irony in Wired Magazine declaring the death of futurism by noting that futurists are now more specialized by category? What they're basically saying is, "The Future is dead; long live the Future-ettes!"

As further irony, Wired itself engages in futurist musings on practically every page, every month; and in such a snarky manner.

Still, I wouldn't mind seeing the likes of Faith Popcorn go by the wayside. And I loved the description of the work computer used by Ed Cornish, founder of the World Future Society (I'm almost surprised they even have a website):

...a DOS machine that doesn't do email, the Net, or Windows.

For its part, the WFS offers this rebuttal to Wired.
WINDY CITY SPORTS NETWORK
scrubs chisox hawks male cows
In about a year from now, Chicago sports fans will have a network where they can get their one-stop fill of Cubs, White Sox, Bulls, and (most surprisingly) Blackhawks. Comcast has partnered with the four sports teams to launch SportsNet Chicago, set to go live October 1, 2004. Apparently, all five entities will own different percentages of the network, which could reach as many as 3.5 million households.

The biggest shock here, and what really makes it newsworthy, is that the Blackhawks have bought into this and are going to have 39 of their games beamed into Chicago households. The NHL's ownership has been the last bastion of dinosaur thinking in terms of sports broadcasting, in that it's refused to allow many games--home or away contests--to be shown on television, apparently believing that it would drain ticket sales. Thinking that was debunked decades ago, in other words. I guess the dwindling fanbase they've been experiencing finally convinced oldtime owner Bill Wirtz to change his mind.

Notice no mention of the Bears. The NFL, of course, reserves the right to control the destiny of all its clubs' broadcast deals, which results in annual fees of some $80 million per team. So obviously, there's scant reason for the Bears, or any other NFL team, to be interested in a venture like this.
ABC GETS MINDSHARE (OR THE OTHER WAY AROUND)
In another move toward advertising-entertainment convergence, the ABC network and the MindShare ad agency have crafted a partnership to develop new television series.

I have to admit I'm simultaneously attracted and repulsed by the concept. My aversion to product placement and other forms of embedded advertising, especially in television and movies, has softened considerably over the years. I guess it's because I've seen enough good examples to see how it can work, and enough clumsy attempts to see how ineffective it is when it's bad. As long as it's done smartly, it's all good.

In addition, I don't watch network TV as it is, so I can't see this impacting me. Doubtless, there will be a ripple effect throughout the television world, especially Disney's other properties.
WAR SEGWAYS
charge!
We've already witnessed how Segway scooters can unintentionally inflict injury. No doubt that malfunction put the bug in some general's ear, because the U.S. armed forces are now working on converting Segways into battle-ready machinery.

Maybe even the Commander in Chief got the idea for this, after discovering what a weapon of mass destruction the thing can be.

In any case, the brass has really gone to town on this, even giving the program a snappy name: Mobile Autonomous Robot Software, or MARS. (Sometimes I think they come up with these things just to create the clever acronyms.)

Here's a bit of specious reasoning from Segway LLC chief development engineer John Morrell:

Since the Segways retail for $3,995 and $4,495, depending on the model, new sales to the government or any other big customer could "help lower the price and let more people afford it."

So selling large volumes of the things to the military is ultimately good for the consumer. Right.

Monday, December 01, 2003

RICHARD PRYOR AIN'T DEAD YET
And thank God for that. I'm watching the Richard Pryor tribute special on Comedy Central, and digging the reminiscences. Although I have to say--and this isn't dismissing his great body of work--I think the praise is getting a bit overindulgent. Maybe it's just the negative mood I'm in.

Anyway, Richard Pryor will always occupy a special place in my heart, because he was one of the featured stars in the very first R-rated movie I ever saw in a theater: Stir Crazy. I was all of nine years old, and pulled what I thought, and probably was, a pretty ballsy move in marching right up to the ticket counter and asking for a ticket in. The movie was disappointing only in that there was very little of the rampant nudity I expected out of a rated-R production. But it pretty much compensated for that with an insane amount of cursing. To this day, I consider excessive cursing in a movie or TV show as a strong foundation to quality comedy (accounting for overall skill, of course).
WHY DO XBOX GAMES SUCK?
x-ed out
Since I'm in bitch mode, I might as well get the following off my chest:

I stopped by a video store during lunch today, one that just opened downtown near my office. I wanted to take a gander at some movies and games for potential rental. I went right for the Xbox section, which looked pretty extensive--something on the order of 100 titles or so. I figured I would find something that was up my alley.

Zilch.

I acknowledge that I'm not the typical videogame console owner. I use the thing primarily as my DVD player. In fact, I'm the atypical, non-gamer Xbox owner; so is the product being targeted at me? Yes and no: No, in that the bread and butter is serious gamers who have preferences in their games and the genres therein; yes, in that the expanded long-range plans for the console is to go beyond gaming abilities to other functions like DVR, multimedia entertainment, online stuff, etc. But then, the gaming aspect of it is still not targeted at me, is it?

In any case, that point was driven home once again today while I was looking through the videostore racks.

How many fucking racing games can they possibly release for this platform? It seemed like every other game was racing-oriented. Within that subset, all but a couple were car racing (the others being some other variant, like speedboats or something). I mean, are they trying to make that a niche speciality for the Xbox? I hate racing games, and so I have no use for any of them.

Adding to my annoyance over those racing titles is that they're just about all overly corporate-sponsor driven. What's being sold as "authenticity" amounts to nothing more than blatant product placement, as games feature Mini-Coopers or the latest muscle cars from Ford or some other car company. It's all crap.

If it's not a racing game, it's a fighting game. Again, they're all the same old deal. They play basically the same, with the same hollow payoff.

The sports titles... Even these have limited appeal for me. I'm not the type to buy a new version every year just to get updated rosters and some new tricks.

Naturally, this reveals my mindset and approach to gaming, which is hopelessly out of touch. I've already stated my overwhelming preference for oldschool 1980s videogames, and my bemusement over how kids view that old stuff. Still. Well, what can you do? I doubt I would have been any more satisfied with a PS2.
LOUSY SANTA
Just got back from catching a matinee of Bad Santa.

God, what a sucky movie. Sucked bad, sucked hard, sucked all over the place. Sucked sucked sucked.

I'm not sure why this one looked appealing to me. I think Bernie Mac's participation gave me hopes that it would be a winner. I was wrong. The marketing pitch, which exploits the gee-whiz novelty of a rude and crude mall Santa in an attempt to position it as a "dangerous" comedy, should have tipped me off to how much of a one-trick pony this thing is.

I can't believe the Coen brothers would even put their names to this piece of shit. I can definitely see the germ of the idea as coming from them, but the weak plot, dully-paced story, flat humor... I can only assume they were slumming. First the insipid Intolerable Cruelty, now this. Maybe they've just sold out completely, I dunno.

What gets me is that I forced myself to stay for the entire movie, instead of following my instincts and leaving in the middle. In the back of my mind, I reminded myself that it was a Coen-connected production, and that somehow there would be a worthwhile payoff at the end instead of the obvious crud. Again, I was wrong-o.

Hell, I'm so disgusted, I don't even want to write any more about it. I might not even blog anymore tonight, I'm so put off. We'll see.

Sunday, November 30, 2003

A NEW, OLD IPOD FOR ME!
many faces of ipod
Easy come, easy go. Just as I get a small windfall of found money, I go and spend half of it on a new toy. The toy in question? A used 10-gig iPod off of eBay.

This is, of course, just under seven months after getting my current, 5-gig iPod from an eBay auction. I was a bit shocked to remind myself that I've had the 5-gigger for that short a period of time; as much as I've used it and carried it around, I would have sworn I'd had it longer, since at least 2002. It's a good sign--it signifies how much pleasure I've gotten from the thing. It's been working like a charm: Great battery life, great sound, easy to update with firmware and files, and I've filled up only about 60 percent of the drive with my music files.

Why get a replacement, then? Well... You know how it is with hard drives: No matter how much storage space you have at hand, you always want more, just in case. I guess that's the reasoning here, specious as it is; and it'll be the same reasoning I employ when I get my next one, which will have 15, 20 or more gigs of storage. That I'll never fill a drive that big is, of course, beside the point. It's more a psychological salve, in that I'll know that no matter what I add to the iPod, I'm never in real danger of running out of room on its drive.

Part of the thrill of this purchase, as was the case with the 5-gig, was to see if I could finagle a good deal for it. And I succeeded: Total purchase price for this new unit was $180, which is the same amount I paid for the one I have now. So I upgraded to double the disk space for the same price--golden. (It's not an exact tradeoff: The 5-gig came with headphones, a carrying case, firewire cable and AC adapter, while the 10-gig comes with nothing but the iPod itself. However, since I've already got the accessories, I'm not too concerned about it. The only hitch in that area is not having the accessories to package along with the spare iPod I'm going to sell soon, but it's not a big deal.)

So now, as is always the case when winning an eBay auction--or purchasing anything online or through mail order, for that matter--the waiting is the hardest part. I'm crossing my fingers that the seller ships that puppy out quickly. Indications from his posting say he will; we'll see. Hopefully I'll have my new toy by week's end!

Here's something to contemplate, and probably expand upon later: I've noticed that many used iPod listings on eBay tout the fact that the devices are "loaded". Loaded in this case means the iPod is filled at or near capacity with music, and the sellers make a point of advertising this in their listings. Obviously, the idea is that an iPod, or any digital music player, preloaded with music is worth more than an empty one. From the time I've spent today and yesterday checking the listings, it does appear that the iPods that had music already on them were drawing higher bids than the ones without. Is this a new eBay strategy? I should note that this could open up another digital rights issue in the music world. Does an iPod seller have the right to sell the music that's already on the device? Even if all the files on it are legitimately ripped copies instead of files obtained illegally through a fileswapping network (that's unlikely in any case), I'm sure the music industry would look unfavorably at a money transaction like this taking place; it definitely goes beyond fair use. Plus, it's apparent that the preloaded music adds value to the transaction, so if this practice really catches on bigtime, it'll attract the attention of the lawyers, and some sort of action will happen. Could be an interesting development.
MICROSOFT UNDER THE HOOD
Microsoft has gotten to where it is today by aggressively pushing its operating system onto computers in the home and office. So it makes sense that it should now target automobiles.

"We'd like to have one of our operating systems in every car on Earth," said Dick Brass, vice-president of Microsoft's automotive business unit. "It's a lofty goal."

Great, just great. I can't wait to have my car's OS crash and demand that I restart the ignition while I'm cruising down the highway at 50 miles an hour. Maybe an MS-powered car will be incompatible with some roads, preventing me from driving to certain locations.
PARIS HILTON'S BLUE ALIEN SEX VIDEO
peek-a-boo
I noticed a couple of weeks back that my referral log was showing a handful of visitors coming to this blog thanks to a Popdex citation regarding the Hilton Sisters. Obviously, the schmoes were on the hunt for the infamous Paris Hilton sex video, and weren't using a fileswapping network like KaZaA to get it. The joke was on them, as the Popdex citation was referring to this long-ago post from July 24th, 2003, which dealt with the Hiltons only peripherally. That's the only time I've mentioned the Hilton Sisters on this blog, either individually or collectively--until now.

Employing a bastardized interpretation of Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle, I took note of the Hilton referrals and decided that it was as good an excuse as any to jot down something about the Paris Hilton imbroglio. Procrastination being what it is, I never did get around to it.

However, while casually surfing around today and doing some non-Hilton-related searching, I managed to come across a link to the taboo sex romp video (courtesy Whizbang!, by way of GS-7). And so I provide the link to you here.

Believe it or not, I hadn't seen it until just now; I'd seen some video stills here and there, but never the actual video. It's about what I expected. The blue lighting is very weird, giving the whole thing a space-alien quality. Without the accompanying audio, I don't think it would be nearly as entertaining.

By the way, I'm not the only one who experienced a spike from Paris-mania. I'll also leave the rundown on the situation to him.
TAMPA BAY COMMUTER BLUES
I've lived in the Tampa Bay area for the past 13 years. Actually, since the first three of those years was while I was in college, and therefore living on campus sans automobile, it's more like ten years that I've really "lived" in the community. It's been a long enough stretch of time to see some major changes.

Growth has been as desired as it's been inevitable. As the second-largest metro region in a state that adds about 500 people a day in population, Tampa Bay naturally gets its share of transplants. That can be good, in terms of adding to the diversity of people in the area.

The bad part? The majority of those people moving in have cars. And that means monstrous commutes all over the Bay area, from Gulf Boulevard to Malfunction Junction to the Suncoast Parkway.

I can attest to things getting worse on the roads. I pretty much stick to my general work-play zone, which is roughly downtown St. Pete (where work, along with other things, is) to the north-northeast part of town (that's home), through to Tampa's West Shore (as that area is so close to my apartment--in terms of traffic time, it's the closest mall and movie theaters to me). I'll head out to other areas with some regularity, like Ybor and Hyde Park in Tampa or St. Pete Beach, but mostly, I stick near the southeast chunk of Pinellas County and the accompanying stretch of I-275 that I call home. Not counting some backroads areas like Pinellas Park and such, my zone is probably, overall, the least-congested part of Tampa Bay's traffic grid.

Yet even this area is no picnic. I think I've lucked out with my work commute, in that I can zoom down either 4th Street or MLK Street in a straight shot to my office building. I encounter some traffic along both roads, enough to annoy me, but nothing hellacious. The interstate is the third option, but one that I rarely take. I'm in a spot where there's no real time savings by going down the highway, mainly because whatever time is saved by the speed is offset by the time spent on the onramp-offramp routes. Plus, the traffic is typically worse there, and getting so seemingly every day. Add to all this that I intersect with Gandy Boulevard and Roosevelt Boulevard, which tend to be treacherously jampacked (fortunately, I never have to traverse either road, just cross it).

Beyond that... There are spots around town that I avoid whenever I can. I have a friend who lives in the northern part of Pinellas County. It's a nightmare to get to his place anytime near rush hour, because the congestion is unreal; what would normally be a 20-minute drive to his place ends up being at least twice that. At this point, we try to meet up on weekends. In general, the western/northern part of Pinellas is absolutely not worth the hassle it takes to get there, and really, there's not a whole lot worth going to there. There are parts of western St. Pete, and all of Clearwater and Largo and other areas, that I haven't been to in years.

Rush hour is generally tons worse than it used to be, and that's my barometer for how crowded it's gotten here. I used to be able to jet over to Tampa by the interstate right after work without much of a problem. Now, the congestion begins as soon as I get over the bridge and lasts until the middle of downtown. There's aren't many things that get to me like being dead stuck on a highway.

What's the solution? Public transportation would be great, and I'd definitely make use of it. For all the pain in the ass that driving to and from work is, it's just not worth having your car to save a couple of minutes, or to be able to stop by the store on the way home. I realize it's wishful thinking, though. Most people won't get on a bus unless they absolutely have to, and the bus system in this area has plenty of shortcomings. There is no rail system, and despite talk, probably won't be for decades, if ever. I wish there was a solution.
FOUND MONEY!
I got me a holiday miracle, a little ahead of schedule, to the tune of $351.26. That's the amount of unclaimed property from the state of Florida that I had coming to me, and finally got months after first making a claim.

I searched the site with the first few letters of my last name, just on a lark. I didn't find my exact last name, but dig it: One of the results did come up with a last name really close to mine, off by a couple of letters, with my first name, and my city of residence. I dug further, and saw that the street address connected to the account was my old address from some six or seven years ago. There was no information on what kind of property it was, so I was instantly curious. I went ahead and submitted my claim.

This being government bureaucracy, the process I set in motion would take many, many weeks. Most infuriating, after the initial contact, it all had to take place through postal mail--argh! Long story short, I had to provide some proof that I really was who I said I was, which, since they had a misspelled name on their files, wasn't quite as easy as it would seem. Plus, because I no longer live at the address I have on file, and haven't for several years, I couldn't come up with any proof of my former residence (I got no cooperation from my former landlords at the old address, fucking schmucks). After a couple of phone calls and false starts, I finally submitted my claim along with a note that stated that, while I had no tangible evidence of my former residence, it was fairly obvious that the misspelled name was me, since my name is unusual enough that there was slim chance it was someone else with such similar first and last names. I basically washed my hands of it after that, and figured that if they accepted that, I would get a nice little surprise at some point; and if not, I gave it my best shot. Happily, I got my surprise.

How did I miss that money all those years ago? I'm not sure. I think I was probably in the middle of moving and starting a new job, and just forgot about a stray paycheck. It's harder to figure how my name could have been misspelled on that paycheck and not on the previous ones I had gotten from the same place. In any case, the funds got mislaid. I'm glad these things do revert to the state, and are kept on file for so many years.

In the grand scheme, 350 bucks isn't a huge amount, and if it were, say, half that, I'm not sure I would have bothered to go to the trouble I did for this. (On the other hand, if it were $500, or a grand or two, I would have really driven to the hoop a lot harder to make sure I got it.) But hey, found money is found money, and I'll take it. Just in time to throw onto the holiday shopping pile, too!

So, let this be a lesson to you: Take a gander at your state's unclaimed property list. Odds are pretty good that it's searchable online. Take a few minutes to search by a couple of variations of your name, or just using the first couple of letters of your last name; if I hadn't done that, I never would have found my claim. There could be something of value waiting for you in your state's capital!

As for me, all I need now is that $12.63 worth of CD class-action suit money and I'll be all set, baby.

Saturday, November 29, 2003

APARTMENT GLUT
We all know about what a great time it is to buy a house, with all those low mortgage rates and abundant housing on the market. The yin to that yang is that apartment owners are feeling the pinch from the resulting vacancies, forcing them to lower rents and/or offer big incentives to keep residents.

I'm one of the lucky beneficiaries. I got two months free rent on my last lease, the first real decrease in annual rent I've experienced. I expect the same deal, if not better, the next go-round, which will likely be my last lease. It's all good, I reckon.
TACKLING WIRELESS WOES IN NYC
I never hear more complaints about mobile phone shortcomings than I do from users in New York City. I'm sure other high-density population areas, and places with lots of hills and mountains, have just as many problems with dropped calls and lack of reception, but the Big Apple seems to be especially notorious.

In response, the city's Department of Information Technology and Telecommunications invited residents to submit their complaints to them. The result is the Mobile Phone Reception Problem Survey, which maps out connection problems throughout the five boroughs (not surprisingly, downtown Manhattan is the site of the most problems) and by service provider (they pretty much all sucked equally).

The purpose of the survey is to submit the results to the providers, in an effort to get them to build more towers, improve equipment, and anything else they can do. The idea is that a consolidated complaint, coming from city government, will carry more weight than would several individual squawks.

I was just up in New York. I didn't spend any time in the city, though, so I can't say whether reception there was any worse than anywhere else I've been. My phone cut out in the train tunnels, naturally, but there's really nothing to be done about that.

Friday, November 28, 2003

BACK IN TIME FOR KUROSAWA
I'm back from New York! The only way to visit family: Arrive Wednesday, leave Friday. Just barely enough time to have Thanksgiving dinner and see family members, not enough time for them to get on my nerves (or me on theirs). Didn't even have enough time to get that bored.

The weather is turning pretty foul back here at the homestead, so going out is not looking like a good option. Plus, I've spent eight or so hours travelling, and while I'm not particularly worn out at the moment, I feel as though I'll hit a wall pretty soon.

But before that happens... I see that Turner Classic Movies is having an Akira Kurosawa festival tonight. I've already missed Seven Samurai, but I can try to pull an all-nighter by watching Yojimbo and Throne of Blood. Throne of Blood especially appeals to me, as it's a Macbeth adaptation, one of my favorite Shakespeare plays.

Eh, why not? I've got nothing planned for tomorrow.

I couldn't figure why they decided to show a samurai filmfest tonight, until I saw Tom Cruise in a between-films segment just now. This is all promotional support for the soon-to-be released The Last Samurai. Always gotta have a commercial tie-in. Actually, Last Samurai looks promising; I'm a Civil War buff, and something of a fan of Japanese history too.

Wednesday, November 26, 2003

SMACKDOWN ON THE BLOGOSPHERE
In comments that I'm sure are causing a snit among devout bloggers, John Dvorak declares that the blogging phenomenon is doomed to failure, about to be snuffed out by blogger boredom and big media manipulation.

This is the type of critique that will prompt many regular bloggers to insist that it doesn't apply to them, because the audience they may (or may not) attract is secondary to the personal satisfaction of putting their thoughts out there. Of course, that Dvorak's opinion would prompt that kind of self-defense only betrays the lack of conviction in that belief.

This argument builds upon survey results released over the last couple of months that suggest the much-hyped blogging revolution is much less than the sum of its parts: The preponderance of dead blogs, and infrequently-updated blog sites; and the relatively small impact blogs really have in the larger population, contrary to assumptions among hardcore bloggers.

I don't think Dvorak is saying anything that's not apparent: Yes, the majority of blogs out there are crap, not worth the time it takes to locate and visit them. But you can make the same argument about just about anything, in media and other areas. The most frustrating aspect of Internet media, professional and amateur, is being able to separate the wheat from the chaffe--probably 10 percent wheat and 90 percent chaffe (I'm probably being generous there). That's why established brands have a leg up, and always will.

I think it's a mistake to view all blogs as true news sources. I've always said, blogs work best as punditry, not as breaking news sources. My approach here, for the most part, is to present my thoughts on some topic, usually a news story, and include any insight or comment I think is pertinent. I'm not expecting to blow the lid off any story, but if someone stopping by finds some value in it, then great.

That leads into what remains my main purpose for this blog: To serve as my "outsourced memory", approximating Vannevar Bush's Memex model. For me, that function overrides any other considerations.

As far as the prospect of big media co-opting the blog world... I definitely see the possibilities. Business has been experimenting with the blog format for a while, with mixed results. Also (personal plug coming up!), I made the potential use of blogging as a marketing vehicle one of my top ten media trends to watch this year; I'm not sure anything will be resolved in that area soon.

Part of the issue remains finding a basic definition of blogging. Is it an inherently amateur presentation? Is it a genre at all, or just a streamlined method of creating Web content regardless of format? Does the general perception attract certain types of audiences, who expect a level of amateurism that they interpret as a "keeping it real" filter? Without settling on this, it's hard to dope out the related issues.

One thing I found unsettling from Dvorak: His take on writing in general:

Writing is tiresome. Why anyone would do it voluntarily on a blog mystifies a lot of professional writers.

Obviously, this is more his bias. Writing sure can be tiresome, but as someone who does it for a living (most of the time), I've found that blogging is a good daily workout that helps keep me in practice. I'm conscious of not including my best material here, but what I present is usually satisfying for me.
TEAM VALUE
money makers
I wanted to link to Forbes' annual coverage of the NHL, centerpieced by a ranked list of team valuations. Unfortunately, the Forbes site appears to be down at the moment, so this post will serve as more of a reminder to look it back up in a couple of days.

In the meantime, TSN has some of the numbers, mainly for the Canadian clubs, along with short comments from team and league execs. It's the usual drill every time listings like this come out: The owners huff and puff about how way off the numbers are, question the credibility of the publication (in this case, one that's been around for decades and is a trusted, respected source), and insist that their little mom-and-pop shops are bleeding enormous amounts of cash, as they have been for every single year since they were founded (but somehow, magically manage to stay in business).

Tuesday, November 25, 2003

THE OLD BOSS
I was surprised to see this article about my old boss, Anver Suleiman, in yesterday's paper. He's launching a new "consultant's consultant" business, and got the chance to explain the thinking behind it.

I noticed he never directly mentioned his supposed main business concern, Luntz, Suleiman & Associates, where I was formerly employed. In fact, after reading the article, I went online to check the site to confirm that the firm was still in operation. It is, although I wonder how active the storefront is. I see they did redesign the site, which was long overdue (although I recognize tons of stuff that I put up there myself, over five years ago!).
GAMING'S PHANTOM MENACE
Do you want a videogame console, but you care nothing for either PlayStation or Xbox? Or GameCube, even? Then maybe Phantom will ring your bell. It's a new game console being developed by Infinium Labs, a company down the way from me in Sarasota.

Don't count on this upstart entry making any kind of impact, though. Judging from the facts available on the company, and the general close-mouthed atmosphere, plus the basic logistics of trying to position a gaming console in the face of a market dominated by Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo (even if they're aiming toward a smaller, hardcore niche), means that this puppy likely won't last a year, if it ever gets off the ground at all.

I think the lack of company commentary in the article is as much a result of Chip Carter's lack of reportage skills; digging out person-to-person information is not his forte, obviously. His generalizations could use some work too, although the editing is partly to blame too. For instance:

But Infinium is entering a field littered with companies that tried and failed to make their mark. Remember the Atari 2600? It shared the market with Mattel's Intellivision in the 1970s and early '80s.

This is an awkward statement, because it implies that the 2600 was somehow a failure. The opposite is true: The Atari 2600 (aka VCS) was arguably the most successful game console ever, having revolutionized (indeed, pretty much created) home video gaming, and staying in production from the late '70s until 1991.

I also question the "half-dozen game machines" Sega is supposed to have launched and botched. I can think of only four Sega consoles that saw American shores: Master System, Genesis, Saturn and Dreamcast (in that chronological order). There was probably a portable/handheld machine in there too, that I can't recall. The Genesis was nowhere near a bust; in fact, it pretty much killed off the old Nintendo NES and ruled the roost for most of the '90s until the PS1 came along.

Anyway, regarding the Phantom... It's a nice idea, especially the move toward non-gaming applications. But really, this sounds like nothing but an Xbox with a $200 markup, and practically no major label software support. The niche gamers they're supposed to be shooting for are more enamoured with PC gaming; I don't see this new box as being enough to lure them away. Providers of customized gaming PCs can make a good go of it; another Florida-based company, Alienware, does that very well. But a console approach... I doubt it.
MISSING LINKAGE
Well, obviously I missed a day of posting. Not entirely my fault; I got in late, and both Blogger and this blog were down. Obviously my hands were tied. I had a couple of things I wanted to post, too; I'll dash off a couple right now, then maybe more later today/tonight.

The unintentional break in action foreshadowed an intentional break, coming later this week. I don't expect to be posting anything on Thanksgiving Day, and probably not that following Friday, either. I'll be out of town, with family for the holiday, and highly doubt that I'll have Internet access (beyond my WAP-enabled phone, which I can't use for blogging). We'll be back to normal on the weekend. Gobble gobble.

Sunday, November 23, 2003

AUDREY TAUTOU AND MADSTONE
oolala
After spending yesterday at a boat show, and subsequently being wiped out for the rest of the evening, I visited Madstone Theater in Tampa for the last day of their free movie weekend. I got to see Amélie for the very first time. I liked it a lot more than I anticipated; it was a whimsical fairy tale through Paris, with the lovely Audrey Tautou portraying a sad but determined good samaritan who ultimately gets what she deserves.

On the way out of the theater, I considered: I've seen, comparatively, a lot of movies featuring Audrey Tautou. In addition to today's flick, I've seen He Loves Me... He Loves Me Not, L'Auberge Espagnole, and Venus Beauty Institute. Four might not seem like many, but for an actress who's appeared exclusively in European cinema, it is. I guess it marks me as an art house goon. It also signifies that Tautou is the Euro-"It" girl of the moment, and with her pixie-ish good looks and charm, she'll likely be in that spot for a few years.

I had intended to make a full afternoon of it and catch Y Tu Mamá También right after Amélie. However, I somehow lost my weekend pass, and so would have had to fill out another form to get a new one, and I didn't feel like going through the hassle. Besides, I had already seen Y Tu Mamá months ago, and while I would have liked to see it again, it was no loss. So I hit the Tampa Museum of Art to see the Toulouse-Latrec exhibit (it was good, but I expected more; I'm a big poster art fan), then headed to a dinner get-together at a friend's house.
"TECH ELITE" AT 31 PERCENT
Do you imagine that you're seeing an increase of tech warriors around you? Every time you turn around, do you see yet another geek with a cellphone AND pager hanging off his belt, along with a PDA in his hand, and probably an iPod in his pocket?

It's not your imagination: These techno-fetishists are growing in number. That's the findings of the latest Pew Internet & American Life survey, which finds that some 31 percent of Americans consider themselves to be "tech savvy".

Nearly one-third of the U.S. population? That sounds pretty high to me, and study author John Horrigan agrees, although there's no reason to doubt the conclusions. I think the study itself, and the study questionnaire, should be looked at closely. I suspect there are plenty of shades of savviness in that 31 percent. Someone who knows how to check email and use Excel may consider himself/herself to be on the ball tech-wise--especially compared to his/her Aunt Martha, who can't even turn on a computer. That doesn't mean much, though.

In the meantime, let me take a closer look at some of the other general findings:

They spend, on average, a total of $169 a month on broadband Internet service, satellite or cable TV, cell phones and Web content. That is 39 percent higher than the national average, $122.

My average monthly tech/communications bill is just less than the national average. If I jacked up my wireless phone minutes, I would be average; similarly, if I spring for digital cable, I'd definitely get closer to the tech savvy average. I'm not sure what "Web content" is defined as being (have to check the report). If it includes ecommerce purchases, then I might be there. Regardless, I'm not sure this spending measure is a real indicator of savviness. I'm sure many a techno-geek will argue that the ability to avoid paying for some of that stuff (i.e., music downloads) is a truer measure of techieness. On the other hand, that's the purpose of a survey like this: To build a consumer demographic profile that advertisers and marketers can use.

Some 29 percent of them have broadband connections, compared with 17 percent of everyone else.

I've only recently gone to broadband. Again, I'm not sure that's a real sign of being "with it" in your relationship with technology, although that's certainly the marketing pitch that's used to encourage upgrades. Indeed, I know plenty of people who have broadband connections, but they're not the least bit tech savvy; in many cases, the prime motivation to get broadband was to free up their home phone line, which according to this survey, would be a petty consideration (since the wireless phone is probably the primary or only phone connection for this demo).

About 7 percent of technology aficionados have canceled their landline phone and gone all-wireless. Only 2 percent of nontechies have done that.

This is probably a defining characteristic of a techie, only because it signifies a high comfort level with advanced phones and their features. It also points to a different mode of thinking vis a vis mobile phones and where they fit into a lifestyle: I know many people who still persist in considering their mobile phone to be an "extra" or emergency phone (much as they were first marketed when they started to become popular); a landline phone, in a fixed location, is a more "real" phone, and so they can't conceive of ever giving that number up.

Despite being plugged in to the Internet and other sources of data more often, only 13 percent of the tech-savvy crowd feels overwhelmed by information. By contrast, a sense of information overload plagues 25 percent of the rest of the population.

This is a question I get asked a lot when I take consumer surveys, and I've always been dissatisfied with the answer options of either "yes, I do feel overwhelmed" or "I like having all that info". Because in my mind, both answers are accurate. I'm an information junkie, and while I feel like I've got more, and access to even more, than I could ever practically use, I like the fact that I do have it. Naturally, it's what you can do with that data.
OPUS IS BACK
back in the saddle
As announced back in September, Berkeley Breathed's back in the comic strip game with the Sunday-only "Opus". I was hoping that my newspaper would be carrying it, and sure enough, it is. I haven't read through the entire comics section to see what, if anything, they've displaced.

The art's pretty ornate, something of an evolution of Breathed's style. Looks good. The first strip was nothing special; I guess it's a warmup.

Saturday, November 22, 2003

HOCKEY HERITAGE RECORD
pond hockey
Tonight the Edmonton Oilers and the Montreal Canadiens will make NHL history when they play before some 70,000 spectators at Edmonton's Commonwealth Stadium in a unique outdoors game. (Check out the behind-the-scenes actions in building the outdoor rink.) I wish I could see it; obviously I'm not going to Edmonton, and it's not going to be on TV for me until next week.

I've seen this game being hyped as the first outdoor game in NHL history. I'm not sure if the league has confirmed that... I could swear that in the NHL's formative years, one of the teams (the Montreal Maroons, perhaps?) played their home games on an outdoor rink. I'm not in the mood to research it right now; if anyone knows, chime in.

Naturally, this being a record-setting event, there has to be a record that's being broken. That record belongs to--ta da!--the local NHL franchise, the Tampa Bay Lightning. The Bolts set the regular-season single-game attendance record ten years ago on Oct. 9, 1993, with 27,227 watching Tampa Bay lose to the first-year Florida Panthers 2-0 at St. Petersburg's ThunderDome (now known as Tropicana Field, or, as us locals call it, The Trop). I hate to see the home team lose out here, especially since I was part of that record-setting crowd. I was in the middle tier, and was astounded to see so many people fill up that huge cavern of a hockey arena. My clearest memory of the night was seeing the game in progress (great sightlines, truly was no bad seat, which was a miracle for such a non-hockey facility), and catching two Lightning players collide into one another in the middle of the ice. The charming early days of an expansion team, I tell ya...

Oh well. The team will have to take down the banner the proclaims it has the regular-season record. But, it can keep the banner that signifies the playoff single-game attendance record of 28,183, set April 23, 1996 versus Philadelphia. I wasn't at that game, but I did watch it on television, at a playoff party.

Update: It seems that 70,000 was a bit high. The final attendance tally was 57,167 who braved the subzero temperature to watch the hometown Oilers fall to the Habs 4-3. Not to mention the Oilers-Canadiens alumni game featuring Wayne Gretzky, where the Oilers old-timers won 2-0.
DISPLACEMENT OF CAMELOT
As we approach the 40th anniversary of the assassination of John F. Kennedy, we're getting to the point where the event has passed out of the active, living American consciousness and squarely into the history books. To a large degree, 9/11 may have supplanted the Kennedy assassination as a watershed moment.

I was born 8 years after Kennedy was shot, so I'm part of the population that doesn't have a personal recollection of it, even through the prism of early childhood. Frankly, I don't remember devoting any serious amount of thought to it, despite a love of history in general, until JFK came out in 1991. That movie is nothing to base your historical scholarship upon, but it was definitely thought-provoking. It also imparted upon me the creepiest post-movie sensation I've ever had while walking out of a theater, before or since.

Other general person impressions of the assassination:

- The "Camelot" label was, in fact, never actually used during the Kennedy White House years; it was a tag given to the era afterward. It stems from a magazine interview that Jackie Kennedy gave right after the assassination; it was JFK's favorite line from the musical "Camelot".

- The conspiracy theories... I guess this answer will have to suffice, until all the records are unsealed in around 20 years (or however long it'll be). I'm skeptical of conspiracy theories in general, and the Kennedy ones are demonstrative of why. I'm not saying it's impossible that there was a grand plot, but I'd need more evidence 40 years after the fact.

- Related to the above, a couple of my old uncles once illustrated for me just why the unsealing of all the Warren Commission files in the mid-21st Century is less than satisfying. I pointed out to them that, eventually, all the facts would come out in the year two-thousand-whatever, so it would be all good. They pointed out: "Sure, after those of us who were around then are all dead." That struck me as significant.

- Lastly, one of the most poignant, and funny, memories of the assassination isn't even mine. It's the recollection of one of my older cousins, who was five years old when it happened; he related it to a group of us only a few years back.

His parents took him over to one of the relatives' houses in New York the day after the shooting for some social gathering. It was, obviously, a somber atmosphere all around. Once they came through the door, my cousin remembers all the aunts and uncles sitting around, low-level chatting and watching the endless news reports on the television. Seeing all this, his father asked the room, in Greek, "What's going on here, then?"

The response, from someone in the room (no one quite remembers who exactly it was) was in Greek. It's pretty much untranslatable. Technically, I can render it into English, but without the context and cadence that a Greek speaker would have, it wouldn't really have the same impact, or the same, almost unintentional, bittersweet humor. Therefore, I'm going to present it here in Greek, and to any Greek speakers reading this, enjoy. I'm not going to use the Greek alphabet; I could, but I have a feeling it won't render correctly in most browsers. So, here it is in Roman alphabet, more or less phonetically:

Na, vlepumeh ta halyah mas.

... It occurs to me that I've just written a fairly lengthy post about historical event I wasn't even alive to witness. So maybe there's still a good amount of relevance to Camelot, after all.
FRIDAY NIGHT AT MADSTONE
mad skillin'
As previously mentioned, I hit Old Hyde Park Village in Tampa last night to catch some free movies at the new Madstone Theaters. Not a bad way to spend a Friday night.

I watched Dr. Strangelove and Pulp Fiction, a couple of old favorites. I'll go back today to catch Amélie and Y Tu Mamá También today; I'm not sure if I want to go this afternoon or tonight.

It's been a few years since I last saw Pulp Fiction. That I was able to remember so many details, right down to minor character dialogue, is a testament to how big an impact the film has had on pop culture in general. The Simpsons alone must have parodied this movie a million times.

I'm considering springing for a membership to the theater. Normally I don't go for things like that, since they invite a flood of junk mail marketing for which the perks are scant compensation. But the theater is located next to a couple of fairly active nightspots, and it occurs to me that the setup is ideal: Go to the movies, then walk across the street for dinner and drinks, thereby making a night of it without a ton of driving (free parking garage is another plus). I'll think about it.

Update: I guess I'll have to hit the movies tonight, or maybe even tomorrow. I clean forgot about a boat show here in St. Pete I was to attend this afternoon with a couple of friends, starting at 3PM.
DRUG-SNIFFING CHIP
sniff this!
Think the job market is tough for you? Just imagine if you were a dog. Think about it: Employment options for your average canine are limited. The entertainment industry is there for a select, talented few; otherwise, there's the seeing-eye profession and law enforcement. That's it, really. The only other options are being kept by an owner--a real crapshoot--or else the life of a stray. Talk about a dog's life.

And wouldn't you know, it looks like technology is conspiring to downsize Fido out of one of his few career tracks. A "dog on a chip" is faster and more accurate at detecting hidden drug cargo than any dog, threatening to put a bunch of mutts out of work.

The poochies can take heart, though. No matter how good this gee-whiz chip is at sniffing out smack, it'll never be able to replicate the time-honored doggie art of sniffing one another's butts.

Friday, November 21, 2003

MADSTONE MOVIES
Whatchu doing tonight? If you're a film snob like me, you'll be hittin' it at Madstone Theaters' free weekend of movies in Old Hyde Park Village in Tampa. You can get your free passes right here.

The movies on tap (in no particular order, they'll all be shown at multiple screenings):

The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert; Sunshine State; Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb; Amélie; Y Tu Mamá También; Pulp Fiction; and Adaptation.

I've seen all these flicks except for Amélie and Priscilla. I have no desire to see the latter. I also don't plan on seeing Adaptation or Sunshine State again; I didn't hate them, but was less than satisfied with them both (especially Sunshine State). So, I'm looking forward to catching Amélie; it was one of those flicks I meant to catch, but never got around to. Also looking forward to catching the others, especially Dr. Strangelove.

It's a good excuse to go party in Hyde Park afterward. It's been years since I've hit any places there. If it's looking dead, I can always head elsewhere.
THE DORK SIDE OF TIVO
Speaking of Tivo, some devotees of the wondrous box are finding that they're getting overloaded with hours of television recordings that they feel obligated to watch. Ironically, the device that was supposed to free up more of their time has instead tied more of it up.

On one hand, I can sympathize. I feel the same way whenever I tape a program: It's almost like a homework assignment I have to watch. This is idiotic, because what's on the tape is always something that I wanted to watch, to the point where I went to the trouble to set up the VCR recording process; but for some reason, that's the feeling I associate with firing up the VCR. By extension, I rarely ever rent movies, pretty much for the same reason (and on those occasions when I do, I only rent one movie at a time). Catching something as it's being broadcast, while demanding in terms of time commitment, takes the decision out of my hands, and therefore makes it easier to experience.

On the other hand... Are these people morons? If the Tivo is pulling in too much stuff, then change the settings. Why create more headaches for yourself?

I'd have to say this is the most pathetic case study of them all:

"I get to the point now where I skip going to the gym so I can keep up with watching 'Dawson's Creek' reruns," which are broadcast for two hours each day, [Kevin Coto] said. "I look forward to when they end so I won't be stressed."

News flash, Kevin: YOU'RE RECORDING RERUNS! Reruns of A CANCELLED SHOW! Not only are they episodes you've probably already seen at least 2 or 3 times each, but they're very likely going to be broadcast again and again and again, for years to come. Not to mention that you could always get them on DVD, or burn them to disc yourself. This is the stupidest reason I can imagine for taking time out for television viewing. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that Kevin is borderline addicted.
CROSSROADS FOR TIVO?
look ma, no tapes!
Is the party over for Tivo, just as its brand name has become a synonym for any type of digital video recorder? That's what analysts like Josh Bernoff at Forrester Research think, as they believe the continuing rollout of settop/DVR combos by cable providers makes Tivo's days numbered unless they can find a partnership with one of those cable companies.

I've said as much, as part of my top ten media trends for 2003 (No. 3). My feeling is that having a separate bill for DVR service, even if it's a nominal amount like $10-15 monthly, on top of a cable bill, is an impediment. Integrating that charge into the cable bill, even if it's for the same amount, is a much easier sell for the majority of consumers. Thus, the DVR that's provided by the cable company has a much better chance of penetrating the market, and dominating it, to the disadvantage of Tivo.

There is the question of whether Tivo's headstart over more generic DVRs, and its brand power, won't help it survive. That's the tack that Tivo enthusiasts like GreenGourd take. Not surprisingly, Mac users also feel that Tivo is in a similar position as Apple Computer, i.e. being able to thrive despite serving a niche market. The feeling here is that Tivo doesn't have to concern itself with becoming the choice of the majority of consumers, because a fiercely loyal fanbase that relishes being on the cutting edge of this sorts of service will keep it afloat.

Obviously, I don't agree. The Apple analogy doesn't really work, because the niche for Tivo is much smaller, and not as well defined. Apple can point to key industry loyalties like publishing, advertising, education, etc. Tivo doesn't have that; even if you point to a higher-income/better-educated demographic that's adopted Tivo (for instance, I notice more and more celebrity endorsements for Tivo, to the point where I'm surprised the company hasn't recruited a few to do ads), it's not a situation where a group of users need to stick with Tivo in order to enjoy similar service. Fundamentally, you're using a DVR to record television signals; you don't need a particular brand of recorder to do that. So unlike a computer, you don't have the issue of different software working on different operating systems. Long story short, I don't see a real strong reason for Tivo to withstand a flood of competition from cable company-provided boxes.

Thursday, November 20, 2003

TAKING IT ALL WITH YOU--TO COLLEGE
Kids today. Rather than suffer the potential separation anxiety from the worldly goods mommy and daddy bought for them, they pack it all up and take it with them to college, where the institutions end up having to up the power ampage to cope.

I guess the concept of using college as an opportunity to start fresh has gone out of style.

All I can think of is that, when I arrived at my college in 1989 as a freshman, things were so primitive that we didn't even have cable TV in the dorms (gasp!). I like to bring that up with colleagues now, to illustrate how I experienced a taste of the campus dark ages. I guess we compensated by drinking heavily and having unprotected sex; I know I did.

We did get cable hookups in the dormrooms and the common lounges the very next year, though; and I immediately noticed the decline in casual group get-togethers in the dorms as a result.
GOLF: THE MUSICAL
fore!
It's pastels-n-putts time, off-Broadway style, as Golf: The Musical makes its long-awaited debut.

I am headed up to New York next week for Thanksgiving. Alas, I don't have much time to hit a show, and if I were to hit one, I think I'd opt for something more like Boobs! The Musical. Plus, if I'm in the mood for golf-related entertainment, I can always fire up my copy of Caddyshack.
THE SIX MILLION DOLLAR NATURAL BIONIC MAN
Ah, the wonders of daytime television. I just saw a commercial for Natural Bionics, a dietary supplement that's supposed to re-build cartilage in your joints. Guess who the celebrity pitchman was for it?

It was none other than the six million dollar man himself, Lee Majors! He was looking pretty young--in fact, much younger than he looked the last time I saw him in some commercial or program or whatever. I'm thinking he's had some work done.

Just think: If Majors lives long enough for the advent of real bionics to become mainstream, he could be in for a bonanza of endorsement opportunities.

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

THERE'S NO "I" IN "WE"
ice gridiron field court
Something that drives me bonkers is how even the casual fan will, in conversation, refer to his/her favorite or local team as "we". Like, "we're looking good to beat Team X this week!" I personally don't know any professional athletes right now, so it goes without saying that when I hear this in a conversation, it's coming from someone who will not be playing a professional down, or shift, or at-bat any time soon. It's the ideal end-result of sports marketing: You get the fans to identify so closely with the franchise they root for that they consider themselves to be part of the team.

I notice that the level of identification is strongest when the team is winning, and decidedly less so when losing comes around. To wit: "Boy, we really kicked some ass yesterday, didn't we!!" versus "Man, they sure sucked the other night, they deserved to lose!"

You can see my feelings on this dynamic. So I read this piece by St. Petersburg Times Sports copyeditor John Strickhouser with a knowing nod. I'm glad to see I'm not the only one with this opinion.

I'll have to remember to compliment Strick the next time I stop by the Sports Department.
MY FAVORITE SIMPSONS JOKE
modern stone-age... nevermind
I'm watching "The Simpsons". The rerun in question just featured what's probably my favorite joke from the entire series. From episode No. 53, "Separate Vocations":

Bart: Wow, you guys get to carry clubs!
Police Officer Lou: They're called "batons", son.
Bart: Oh... What do you use them for?
Lou: To club people.

Simply priceless.

By the way, according to commentator Jon Bonné at MSNBC, the show no longer sucks as much as it has been the past five or so years, thanks to a de-emphasis on Jerkass Homer. I'll believe it when I see it; maybe I'll keep in mind to catch the new episode this coming Sunday.
BLOGGING AND WORKPLACE WRATH
Well, maybe not wrath, but unintended consequences, anyway. Following up on what to do when your mommy finds out about your blog, Blogger serves up tips on how to avoid work-related problems from your blog and blogging.

Very cute, Blogger-dudes. Just see that your Creative Tutorials don't get in the way of providing timely maintenance and support for us users.

I've blogged from work. It's been situations where things are realllllllllly slow, and I'm dead bored. Occasionally, I'll post something during lunch as well. Definitely not something to make into a habit, least of which because the timestamp makes is so obvious as to when you're doing it (you could always go back and monkey with the timestamp, but it seems like a lot of trouble). You may notice that I'm posting right now on a weekday afternoon, typically work time; however, I'm actually taking this week off, so it's my time burning away here.
THROWING AWAY THE KEY
all played out suckaneers
When you're 4-6, a drastic move is expected. The Super Bowl champion Bucs did just that yesterday by deactivating receiver Keyshawn Johnson for the rest of the season and telling him to stay home.

The only reaction I have is, where are Keyshawn's catches going to go now? For all the news he'd make over complaining about getting only one catch in a game, there are plenty of other games where he'd get the ball a lot. So far this season, he's led the team in receptions in three out of ten games, including 10 grabs for 123 yard against the Saints on Nov. 2 (a 17-14 loss). Call him a cancer all you want, but it's going to be hard to replace him in the middle, even with Joe Jurivicius back now from injury (and tabbed as Keyshawn's replacement in the slot).

It's hard not to see this as making Keyshawn the scapegoat for what's turning into a dismal season. He's the vocal one, he's the one who's always complaining, and he likely was going to be gone after this season regardless. However, if the Bucs don't make any other moves, in areas that are looking like much bigger problems--the defense's inability to protect a lead, the special teams' ineptness--then it looks pretty bad from their side.

While this move is making the national rounds, and will continue to do so through this weekend and beyond, the coverage from the St. Petersburg Times offers some very good inside perspective. Most of the stories are on the Bucs coverage page; however, since I can't find an archive-ready version of today's edition, I'll list out the stories below:

- Q&A on what exactly the Bucs did and why, including why they didn't just release Keyshawn outright (the NFL trade deadline passed in October, by the way);

- Columnist Gary Shelton on who's side of the story you believe--Coach Jon Gruden's or Keyshawn's;

- Reaction from the Buccaneer players, who mostly weren't tremendously surprised (note the reference to how similar this is to former Cleveland Browns receiver Kevin Johnson getting released last week; he's since been picked up by the Jacksonville Jaguars);

- Various statements from both Gruden and Keyshawn from the preseason (July 2003) to earlier this month, referring to their working relationship, including Keyshawn's feather-ruffling statement about how Bill Parcells was the best coach he ever played for;

- Reaction roundup from the Bucs and other sources, including ESPN, NFL Network, and Keyshawn's agent;

- What the Bucs' receiving corps now looks like, barring any further moves;

- The official statement from One Buc Place;

- Finally, the online consequence of this news bombshell, as Buccaneers.com got swamped with more hits than ever before, including during the Super Bowl run.