The Critical 'I'

Read. React. Repeat.

Wednesday, December 04, 2002

SHOE-TYING CALCULATIONS
screw crop circles, this is where it's at
"Over and under, in and out / That's what shoe-tying is all about."

Forget your little infant nursery rhymes! Tying shoes is serious business! Don't you know that the optimum method of lacing up and tying your footwear can be determined through sound scientific and mathematical means?

Of course, these results come from using the ideal shoe model, one facet of which is that it exists on only one plane/dimension. Which means it's flatter than flat. Which means your arches would have to fall WAY down for you to wear it.